Luxembourg’s shops sell record amount of old junk.

Luxembourg’s shopkeepers were celebrating on Monday afternoon after managing to sell off over 90% of old shit that had been sitting at the back of the stock rooms since January.

Low prices, accompanied with awful music and idiots on microphones who thought they were working at the Schueberfouer, helped most shops shift all their crap on to an unsuspecting crowd.

“We have been trying to sell this shit since Christmas 2003” said one shopkeeper as he sold the last of the chocolate fireguards for 3 euros.

“We’re very happy with today’s results and are looking forward to stocking up with as much cheap crap as possible ready for Halloween.”