Belgians to face 14 day quarantine, unless they bring beer

Belgians visiting Luxembourg are to face a 14 day quarantine with the exception of Belgians bringing beer into the Grand Duchy it was announced today.

As from next week, every Belgian traveller must bring at least one 6-pack of good Belgian beer in order to have open travel inside of Luxembourg.

Ministers are still deciding which beer is required, but rumours are that Chouffe and Vedett will be accepted.

Nobody really sure why train stations exist between Arlon and Namur

A recent survey revealed that regular train passengers who travel from Luxembourg to Brussels have absolutely no idea why train stations even exist between Arlon and Namur.

The frustratingly slow train which travels between 2 major European cities has come under fire for being totally boring and even going as far as ridiculing the silly hats worn by train ticket collectors. 

But the big mystery seems to be why Belgian authorities have decided to build train stations in the middle of nowhere. 

Jean-Pierre is a regular commuter on Belgian trains; “I just don’t get it. Nobody ever gets on and nobody ever gets off. It’s like Willy Wonkas chocolate factory.”

His statement was backed up by a fellow passenger. “I saw a scout group get on once at Gembloux. It was very strange. I guess they had been camping somewhere in the great outdoors.”

Luxembourg border controls for personal hygiene for Belgian drivers

Luxembourg’s border poluce uave stepped up controls on personal hygiene after yesterday’s stench spread across the country. 

After the bad smell was officially blamed on a paper factory near the Belgian border spread across the country, Luxembourg authorities are taking no risks and have warned motorists to shower and wear deodorant before making any attempt to cross the border into Luxembourg. 

Strict controls are expected to last across the festive season, as many border workers will be attending Christmas parties while still dressed in their work clothes.