Tag: holiday

Ibiza clubs to close as Lydie Polfer plans holiday

by Benelux News, posted in Uncategorized

News spread across Europe from the White Isle this afternoon that Ibiza clubs may be forced to close for the duration of time that Lydie Polfer, Luxembourg’s City Mayor, could visit for a holiday.

Lydie ‘Party Pooper’ Polfer is rumoured to be travelling to the White Isle this summer and is likely to disagree with many young people having fun while on the island.

After giving out many restrictions to the nightlife industry in recent months, the plan is to expand across Europe.

The nightlife industry, which is struggling to get back on its feet after the pandemic, is naturally not happy and urges to remind ‘Party Pooper Polfer’ that the people who attend nightlife events are voters too.

Early closing times for various events have left many people stranded without transport options to get home and created a sense of frustration. With calls for the Party Pooper to resign.

Woman going on holiday thinks 20kg baggage allowance is a target 

by Benelux News, posted in Europe

A woman from Bertrange was shocked this week to discover that the 20kg baggage allowance for her flight was in fact a limit and not a target. 

Despite not needing half the clothes she packed for her holiday, she became agitated when her husband pointed out that she would probably do some shopping on holiday and would need more space available in her suitcase in order to bring the shopping back home.

After some despair and stress, she then suggested that she put some of her clothes in to her husbands suitcase in order to take everything that she thought she might need.

After the husbands initial refusal, an argument then occurred which resulted in him just giving up packing all together and had to just shut up while she finished packing. 

“I just don’t understand,” she said. “I always make the baggage allowance a target as I thought the airlines wanted me to pack that much, so that the bag doesn’t collapse under all the other bags in the hold. It’s so confusing.” 

The man was unavailable for comment.

Luxembourg joins list of global abandoned cities while the whole country goes on holiday 

by Benelux News, posted in Daily Life

Reports came in this morning that Luxembourg has officially joined the official list of global abandoned cities after almost the entire population went on holiday. 

Shops and restaurants closed throughout the city and people were nowhere to be seen.

Despite worry from local business owners, local politicians reassured them that “they’ll be back soon.”

Woman who claims “Life’s a Beach” has to be back in the office on Monday 

by Benelux News, posted in Daily Life

Shock and disbelief spread throughout the country this morning as the news arrived that the girl who is friends with a lot of people on Facebook and instagram has to be back at work on Monday morning. 

As details leaked, it turns out that her life is not spent on a beach and in fact only spent a week on a bargain priced holiday. 

There was nothing spiritual about her beach photos and certainly nothing as magic as the instagram filters would suggest. 

By posting such pictures constantly online, she was kind of hoping for some kind of fame. The sad reality that there won’t be hoards of fans waiting for her at the airport when she lands seems to be becoming more real. Even after checking in to the airport to say she is travelling home.

There are currently 648 emails in her work inbox which need to be replied to before Wednesday.