Luxembourg’s top scientists gather to protest measures

Luxembourg region’s top scientists have been gathering over the last months to protest measures brought in by the Luxembourg government to stop the spread of the Covid 19 virus.

Hundreds of protesters gathered to argue against the measures, claiming they went against all the education they had researched on Facebook and YouTube.

Local police however decided to take out the hardcore of the protesters by arresting a drummer and a few randoms who had been drinking most of the day.

More protests are planned.

Lux Tram to be extended to Dubai

Luxembourg transport minister, François Bauch, announced today that plans to extend the Luxembourg Tram network as far as Dubai have been approved.

Work on the extended tram lines is expected to start next year and will continue as far as 2031.

Funding for the tram extension was approved by the government and received extra praise from Prime Minister Xavier Bettel, who regularly enjoys visits to the UAE, with or without travel restrictions.

Based on travel times around Luxembourg City, the total distance travel time is hoped to be less than 3 years between Kirchberg and Central Dubai.

Authorities discover secret cafes under schools

A big surprise this week as authorities discovered several secretly hidden bars, cafes, restaurants and discos this week underneath a number of primary schools across the country.

As covid cases raised steadily among pupils, leading the government to make decisions to close schools, it seems that the new spread of the virus seems to have come from the underground caves hosting the illegal restaurants.

Students as young as 4 have been rumoured to regularly drink in these establishments, prompting an enquiry by the Police.

“It is now clear where this is coming from,” said an education spokesperson. “By shutting down the schools, we can therefore stop the students going into the secret restaurants and stop the spread once and for all.”

French Hunting Season opens in Luxembourg

French Hunting Season has officially opened in Luxembourg, allowing local residents to legally be able to go hunting for frontaliers crossing the border for non essential reasons.

Officials are hoping to slow down the spread of Covid 19 by allowing such measures and hopefully allowing some entertainment during these difficult times.

The decision to open the season came after record numbers of French and Belgian “Covid Tourists” flooded over the borders for non essential shopping. Restaurants reported being completely full, however they received record lows in terms of tips.

Luxembourgish and French police launched border operations that included helicopters, in order to catch perpetrators crossing the borders on small roads.

After witnessing some scenes, officials have now announced the start of French Hunting Season and hope that this will serve as a deterrent.

Anyone who happens to have a successful hunt, is encouraged to stuff and preserve the catch and hang it on a wall, maybe as a decoration that the family can enjoy at Christmas.

Disco that refused you entry for your shoes, now needs your support

Late night discos across the country are appealing for financial support amid the Corona Virus crisis in order to stay afloat.

The well known local establishments who are famous for rejecting clients for their choice of clothes, skin colour or even because they want more girls than boys inside, are now begging all of you for your financial support.

“We used to allow in only VIPs”, said one club worker. “Well, there was nothing really important about them at all, they were just stupid enough to pay a thousand euros to stand at a table with a cheap bottle of vodka.”

“I’m some cases, we would drag some people outside to beat them up if we wanted fresh customers on that table. Our Facebook reviews can confirm this.”

The Corona Virus has presented new challenges for businesses all over the country, so please, choose very wisely who you decide to help.

The #dontforgetus is currently circulating to raise awareness for the late night industry.

Final days of using “Moien” as accepted currency

Luxembourg residents are entering the final days of using “Moien” as accepted currency when boarding the bus.

For generations, Luxembourg citizens have used the word “Moien” to ‘pay’ for bus rides. Walking straight onto the bus confidently and giving the impression that you definitely have a valid bus pass in your pocket has long been a tradition in the Grand Duchy.

Now as the 1st March approaches when free transport across the country will become free, many residents are confused how this will effect driver / passenger relations.

Benelux News managed to speak with some bus users ahead of this historic ruling.

“Wait….. What…. You mean we had to pay before?” said one passenger.

While others were considering buying a 1st class ticket just to get away from ‘commoners’ using the free carriages on the train.

How this will effect the comfort of trains and buses in the future, only time will tell.

Meteolux issues red alert for storm in teacup

Meteolux this morning announced a “red alert” status for Luxembourg after signs of a storm in a tea cup were brewing.

Meteolux claim the storm could spread quite widely causing hot water to get spilt and maybe some twigs outside to fall to the ground.

Residents are urged to remain indoors and only go to the pub if absolutely necessary.

Construction worker shouting incomprehensible gibberish

Several heads turned this morning after a construction worker was attempting to communicate with his colleague using an unspecified language.

Local worker Joao was trying to signal to his colleague with the digger that he was too far across the area by simply shouting incomprehensible gibberish as loudly as possible.

Onlookers looked confused as nobody could tell if the language being spoken was French, Portuguese or just complete nonsense.

Joao was unable to do an interview as he was too busy supervising stuff.

Local man starts drive home for Christmas in November

A local man started his drive home from Luxembourg City this afternoon and is hoping to arrive at his home in Neideranven in time for Christmas day.

The city’s streets have been plagued with traffic jams over the last few days and so the man is hoping to get a head start by setting off today (Friday 8th November).

At the time Beneleux News held the interview with the man sitting in his car on the Avenue de la Gare, he was remaining optimistic.

“I thought if I leave the office now, I could get a head start,” said the man.

“I’ve got enough petrol in the tank and a supply of food and drinks with me, it should be possible. I’m also loaded with an extensive library of Chris Rea songs to keep my optimistic for the journey. All I can think about are the happy faces of my wife and kids when I arrive.”

All the staff here at Beneleux News wish him the best of luck and will try to catch up for a progress interview in a few weeks when he reaches the Black Stuff.

Lydie Polfer takes direct action after scooter spotted at protest

Luxembourg City mayor, Lydie Polfer promised immediate action yesterday after residents of the gare area protested at the bottom of rue de Strasbourg against rising numbers of drug dealers and prostitution in the area.

The protest went mostly unnoticed by government officials until a child on a scooter appeared at the protest.

As the emergency news reached government offices, Mme Polfer promised direct action against this menace of the streets.

An official report is yet to be made, but if rumours are to become true, it appears that Mme Polfer would prefer to keep the dealers on the streets and ban the use of rentable Scooters.

More news as it breaks.