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Luxembourg border controls for personal hygiene for Belgian drivers

Luxembourg’s border poluce uave stepped up controls on personal hygiene after yesterday’s stench spread across the country.  After the bad smell was officially blamed on a paper factory near the Belgian border spread across the country, Luxembourg authorities are taking no risks and have warned motorists to shower and wear deodorant before making any attempt to cross the border into […]

Daily Life

“Christmas is a time for giving” claims barman charging €3.50 for a 25cl beer at Christmas Market

People this year were reminded that Christmas is a time for giving while Christmas stands were charging customers higher prices for drinks and food than normal bars. While paying just €40 a day for stall rent and having volunteer staff working his Christmas stall, the local man running the stand said; “It’s a time for giving and what better way […]

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World’s biggest facepalm causes earthquake fears after Trump wins presidency

Emergency services were alerted this morning after the world’s biggest simultaneous facepalm triggered earthquake warnings reaching 7.2 on the richter magnitude scale. Donald Trump’s elected presidency triggered the tremors so strong, even the financial markets collapsed. Despite reassuring speeches and statements made from the new President and relevant authorities, world citizens are being told to be vigilant. 

Daily Life

Bertrange residents evacuated after Cora / Del Haize peace talks break down

Residents were evacuated over night last night after peace talks between two rival supermarkets broke down in the early hours. The official announcement was made at 2.55am with military force and aid workers arriving as early as 4.00am. “People were panicking and understandably very nervous of the situation,” said one of the aid workers. “We are working around the clock […]

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Loud Americans manage to annoy entire restaurant 

Hungry eaters were left feeling frustrated last night after a group of American business men went for dinner at a city centre restaurant.  The group of four men sat down at a table around 8 o’clock and made their presence very known.  The group were talking and laughing loudly while they discussed various topics, all related to work and being […]

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Workaholic can’t understand why colleagues are happy it’s Friday

A city centre office workaholic with no friends simply can’t understand why his colleagues are happy it’s Friday, it was revealed today. The statement came as fellow colleagues were discussing weekend plans in the office during a coffee break. “They were discussing what they are planning to do this weekend and someone suggested leaving a bit early,” the man said. […]

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Immobilier values kettle at €12,500 

One of Luxembourg’s top immobilier companies has decided on the value of a kettle at €12,500 yesterday, after the home owners decided to leave a few items behind. The apartment is due to go on the market next week and hoping to fetch a huge price. “The owners decided to leave a few things behind and so we valued them […]